Pleasing.

"Jesus my heart must know

I'm pleasing to you."

Can I just say that this is a constant longing in my heart for Jonathon.  I want to be needed and loved by him.  To be so much more than words can even express.  These past few weeks I have realized that I will always fall so short.  That no matter how much he loves me and needs me I will always have insecurities because of what Satan tries to throw in my face.  These insecurities then at times take hold of my thoughts and actions and I treat Jonathon whether in conversations or in my mind so horribly.  Instead of building him up I use my words to tear him down so as to some way feel like I am bringing him down to as low of a place as I feel.  Never do I want that.  Never.  As I sang these words tonight God just spoke truth to me in my thoughts.  To Jesus, I am always pleasing.  That is an amazing concept to have to deal with.  He does not care about the stupid things Satan tries to convince me Jonathon cares about.  And no matter how much Satan can try to lie to me about that he better not dare try to tell me that about my Jesus.  I am so assured of Jesus' love for me. I have so much more to say but it's late and Jonathon can talk so I have to cease this opportunity because I stinkin love that man.  He is so good to me when I really do not deserve it :)