November 23, 2010

A year ago today my best friend asked me to be his wife. Here's the story for memories sake.

Engagement.

Well, it has been forever since I have blogged. And with my recent excitement I figured there is not better time to start again. With the craziness of these past couple weeks I have officially lost my camera adapter. So I reluctantly will post the exciting story of my engagement without pictures.

Last Monday I went out to dinner with a few girlfriends and Jaime and I were going to go look at Christmas lights in Detroit. Jonathon was planning on coming home Tuesday night and I could barely contain my excitement to see him. As we ate dinner I tried my best to not rant and rave about him the entire time and I think I did pretty good. As the waiter came back with our bills to sign he handed me mine along with a letter. My heart began to race and I was physically shaking. As I unfolded the letter and read the words, “Hey Beautiful” I was floored. I read the letter and was informed that because Jonathon and I hadn’t been able to talk much the past few days he wanted to send me on a scavenger hunt. I was so anxious to finish it and it was just beginning. Jaime and I had a great time going from place to place and little did I know the hassle that went into it. I first went to Panera Bread where there were two iced green teas already purchased for Jaime and I. We were told to sit and enjoy them and get a free refill before we could go on. I have never tried to drink so fast. I cheated and poured half of mine into hers so we could leave quicker. We then were off to Barnes and Noble where I had to find a letter inside of “Crazy Love” and the new Bon Jovi book. In the first letter he made a statement about how he wished he could be there at the end but tomorrow will be awesome. Deep down I really wanted him to show up at some point but I knew his entire day and how he had this ridiculously long rehearsal and then had to go straight to sound check before his show.He had far too many details the past few days for it not to be true. But still I hoped. He then sent me to Bostons and Starbucks. The letter at Starbucks ended so nonchalantly that I was sure that it was it. I was told to sit and enjoy my time with Jaime and that my last surprise would come when I least expected it. So we left and headed home to drop off our food before we went to Detroit. My mind reeled on the way home. When I least expected it… Well, I expected it to be tonight, so I guess tomorrow is when I least expect it, which is when he’s coming in, so I guess that makes the most sense. Then he calls me. I answer with hesitation and question in my voice and he just goes off. Rehearsal was awful, the drummer is so unprofessional and they kind of got into it, he left the cable at home for his such and such pedal that he uses most frequently so he had to rig something together. Now he’s on his way to the venue and is trying to get a hold of his roommates so they can bring it since their both coming to the show but their not answering and oh Mike’s calling now and he’s pulling into the venue so he’ll call me after the show and he loves me so much. That clenched it. Jonathon was still in California and my scavenger hunt really was over. As we headed to downtown Detroit I was practically falling asleep and thinking that I cannot believe we’re just now leaving past ten and I have to work at 615 the next morning. So we ended up down by the big Christmas tree in Detroit and it was strange. No one was really there, we were just wandering around aimlessly and I thought the tree looked nice with the water all around it but was ready to leave already. A few moments later Jonathon comes walking around the tree. I freaked. We hugged; I wouldn’t let go of him. He asked me if I liked my last surprise and of course I said yes. It was so wonderful to see him a day early and he looked so handsome and all. He then proceeded to tell me he had one last surprise and said real nice things and got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. He pulled out the ring and opened up the box upside down. And I smiled a lot. I said yes. We hugged. We kissed. I was giddy. I was surprised. It was perfect. With as much as we talked about getting married I was sure I had his little plan all figured out. I was so wrong and I love that. I never thought he’d be able to surprise me. So now I am engaged to the most amazing man of God I have ever met. I get to be his wife. And being engaged is so much fun. I love wearing the ring. It is oh so perfect for me: simple, delicate, unique, mine. So that’s my story, without pictures, but perfect nonetheless. Being in love just keeps getting better and better.

Crazy Aunt.

It is hard not to be obsessed with my nephew.

Now I have a niece. Emily Jane.

I can't get enough and I have yet to even meet her.

Then in March I am supposed to find away to manage the love and obsession for yet another nephew. I love being an aunt. It is amazing. Too amazing for words more often than not.

I love kids enough as it is. But add the relational aspect to it all it's overbearing. My heart just explodes with love and adoration and joy.

I don't want to be some crazy aunt.

But I totally am.

Embrace your Place.

Last night at church a super fantastic woman of God, Christine Caine, spoke on 1 Corinthians 12. It was a very powerful reminder about the unique places we all have in the body of Christ, and that we can only carry out God's destiny for our life when we are in the place He has created us for.

During many a sermons I find an excitement in my mind when the Pastor calls out a passage of scripture that I have just finished reading on my own. And a majority of the time I end up in shameful disbelief that I so greatly missed such an amazing message in that portion of scripture. Last night was no different. She referenced back to Moses killing the Egyptian over the injustice of his treatment toward the Hebrew. By his own strength he was able to save one Hebrew. But when he was in the place God had for him, the back of the desert working, was when God began to launch him into his destiny of saving millions of Hebrews. Also, God waited to speak to Moses until Moses was looking at the burning bush... not just in the proximity of it. I missed every bit of that when I read that on my own just a couple weeks ago. And rewriting it now it just seems like such common sense. I love the wisdom God blesses to teachers, but I want it for my own self.

I also want to be in the place God has for me.

I am stuck in a place with my job.

I can't figure out if I am still in it because I am scared to step out into the unknown of what God has for me.

Or if I am being wise and waiting on the Lord's direction.

Or if this really is the place that God is going to launch me from.

Sometimes when it comes to life Im no good.

Like how I woke up an hour late this morning and now there is a line to do laundry.

And how I ended up sitting here, drinking coffee, writing a blog instead of running.

I am going running now.

And if there is still a line for laundry when I get back maybe I will go rollerblading.

And maybe Ill just work out forever until my husband wakes up because he's sick and Im sad he's sick.

There are a lot of people in my life from Michigan that I miss.

God loves me so crazy much.

Setting the scene:

Date Night.

Barnes and Noble.

Christianity Section.

Bible Shelves for more accuracy.

Jon and I stood staring up and down these two shelves for my long since desired ESV Study Bible. When we had thoroughly exhausted the search after many many minutes:

Jon: Well this sucks.

Proceeds to begin walking away.

Me: No Jon! Maybe if we just stare longer it will show up.

Jon: laughs and obliges.

We stare for many many more minutes.

And then I notice at the end of a shelf one Bible turned with the bottom facing out.

I look.

I say: Oh my gosh. This is it.

I remove it.

And it's it.

Large Print.

Nasty.

But with hope I practically skip through the store searching for the man who can tell me if there's a copy for healthy eyes.

[And at this moment typing this out I realize that probably would have been easier from the beginning, but then I probably wouldn't be blogging now, so maybe thats the reason God withheld that wisdom from our minds... or we're just dumb]

Anyways. I think that rant was too long for parenthesis, but clearly this blog is too exciting for correct grammar so what does it really matter.

And now that I think about it, I do not know the correct etiquette for parenthesis.

Anyways so the man searches the computer, yay they have it.

Searches the shelf... which I had informed him had already been done but then realized that God made my last joke turn real life so maybe he'll see it.

He doesn't.

He goes to the back room.

Comes out empty handed.

Apologizes.

I'm real sad.

But hopeful, because God turned my joke into reality and I knew he loves me too much to tease me like that.

What seemed like many minutes later after searching for other such exciting discoveries my B&N worker friend came back... My dream bible in tow.

Jon and I read John. Then Proverbs, Isaiah, Jeremiah, Psalm, and 1 Peter, all in part of course.

And it has been one of my most favorite date nights.

God and Sleep.

Sometimes it is the hardest for me to sleep when God is moving so mightily.

Right now is one of those moments.

God is just stirring something.

And I want it all right now.

Oh there is so much more time I need with God.

Guiltless.

I bought clothes for myself today.

I didn't buy one thing for another person.

This is the first time ever I do not feel guilty about this.

And it will probably be the last.

Lead Me. Blog number Two.

So a bit and a while ago I posted the amazing song "Lead me", which of course stirred my heart because my husband rocks at life and I desired for all men to cry out to God like this.

And then about a week ago Jon began to lead us in worship and asked me what I wanted to sing.

(In this I will admit one of my greatest flaws as I wife which I am happy to say I am getting better at, but this night obviously was not.)

I really wanted to sing "How He Loves" by Misty Edwards because well, if you've heard it you wouldn't need to know why.

But instead of just saying that I said, "oh Jon whatever you want will be lovely with me blah blah"

So he pressed a little more to know what I really wanted because he's genius and knew I was lying, but I am stubborn and he caved and chose "Lead me"

Now at this point in the story you should see my amazing appreciation as a wife to have a husband with such an anointing and intense gift about to lead me in worship...

Instead you will see my selfish, sinful irritation that Jon would choose to lead me in a song that should be his alone time worship and not a girl worship.

So of course, knowing I brought this on myself I kept quiet, attempted to sing a bit and actually have my heart and soul worship with the words, which they did not because I suck.

Afterwards my amazingly smart husband led us in "How He Loves" without my nudge in the least and I then appreciated his awesome thoughts and the rest of our night of worship.

Then Jon made us a new cd in which the first song is in fact, "Lead Me."

So Jon plays this on our way to San Diego.

And then I hear it...

God tugging away at my heart and telling me to put my silliness aside and pray this prayer to Him.

Ahh and now I pray it everyday all the time since.

It's amazing.

It's a cry of social justice.

Picture that homeless man you wouldn't even look at for a second glance the other day:

“Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone”

Picture that orphan you feel like will be fine without the money you need to buy coffee:

“Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone”

Picture that ultra-sound of the child that was aborted before they had a chance:

“Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone”

Picture that friend you won't tell about Jesus:

“Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone”

Seeing the faces in my mind and hearing the cry for peace, love and social justice is what has brought me before the LORD crying out:

"So Father, give me the strength
To be everything I'm called to be
Oh, Father, show me the way
To lead them
Won't You lead me?

To lead them with strong hands
To stand up when they can't
Don't want to leave them hungry for love,
Chasing things that I could give up

I'll show them I'm willing to fight
And give them the best of my life
So we can call this our home
Lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone

Father, lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone"

Busy.

I all of a sudden feel like I have too much to do to sleep at night.

But I want to wake up and run with my husband while still getting a decent night sleep.

I am determined to be asleep by 11 tonight...

Relationship Status.

Yesterday in discussing how confusing dating relationships can be,

Jonathon, with his infinite wisdom told me:

"I love us, we're either married, or we're dead."

Sick.

I am not good at being sick at all.

Throat spray is disgusting and after a few days I just read the directions that Im not supposed to swallow it.

But I am laying in bed and it hasn't killed me yet and Id rather take the risk of what a tiny spray can do to my insides than get out of bed to spit it out.

I am finally after a week of this taking a sick day and going to the doctor.

Doctors cost so much money when you forget to choose a family doctor from your insurance list and it takes a couple weeks to process.

Love my thought process of worrying about it when I need to actually go.

Urgent Care it will be.

Goodnight world.

I intend to wake up feeling 100% healthy p.s.

Lead Me.

This song is amazing to me.

I just think it is so essential for men to understand this!

I really do have a sensational husband.

I also think Sarah was really funny to be laughing at God.

I also think I'm really funny to do the same thing when I read how God spoke to her and I hear how God speaks to me.

Tonight I am very busy thinking I guess because I am also thinking of how I am just not okay being sick.

I am also thinking of how many people don't have clean water.

Yet I dont feel well so I can just sit under wonderfully warm clean water for really as long as I like.

Also, I must be very out of it and very tired because Jonathon is currently gone at rehearsal and I keep hearing unsettling noises that make my heart leap until I realize that I was the cause of the noise. I need sleep.

Zechariah.

Today on the phone Zechariah taught me the different noises that animals make.

Saturday at 534 am I am going to hug him to no avail.

Sorry to his mother, but I won't even stop if he is sleeping :)

Even though I take care of babies as a profession and I know what a bad choice this could be.

My desire for him is overwhelming.

And I am about to eat chicken noodle soup and drink orange juice that my husband so graciously went to buy for me so by tomorrow I will be completely healed and he wont even get any of my nasty germs that are hurting my throat so immensely right now.

I consider myself the happiest aunt right now.

Psalm 149:5

psalm 149:5

"let the godly exult in glory;
let them sing for joy on their beds."

Loved reading this in bed last night as Jon and I sang to Jesus.

Love my husband.

Love my Savior.

Love my marriage.

Girls Weekend.

So this weekend: My dear dear friend took me away.

And it was superb beyond belief.

We were at this amazing paradise resort in San Diego.

Everything about it was perfect.

The walks, food, conversation, live music, bed... EVERYTHING!!

Then. I get to go home and cuddle with my husband all afternoon :)

Life is good.

2 hours.

Jon has been working a lot lately. A lot a lot.

Tonight we had a brief two hours to hang out between work and more work.

It was the greatest.

Sometimes I have to remind myself that God's purposes for Jon's life are far greater and more meaningful than my sometimes desires to do nothing but cuddle all day long, although those days are obviously fantastic, they come when God, knowing the deepest areas of our hearts, sees fit to bless us with them.

Being married never ceases to amaze me.

My husband, never ceases to amaze me.

God's word, never ceases to amaze me.

It's nice living a life of amazement.

Amazement: Overwhelming astonishment.

Overwhelming: to overcome completely in mind of feeling.

Astonishment: Overpowering wonder or surprise.

This is real.

http://eventide.com/News/User%20Profiles/Jon%20Ketcham.aspx

Pretty much, I am married to a rockstar.

True Story.

Kitchen Light.

This evening Jon dropped me off at my connect group.

He had to go finish working on a song and wouldn't be done by nine so I asked a friend to drop me off at home.

I knew it'd be dark and I'd be coming into the apartment alone so I left the kitchen light on.

I walked out of the apartment with Jon right behind me, I started walking out the gate but then turned and realized Jon was still locking the dead bolt like a good husband.

I waited, he finished, we walked.

This evening as I came in I unlocked the door, makes sense to do that.

As I began to open it I realized that I was walking into a completely dark apartment, note: not how I left it.

I froze.

My mind formed the following scenario so quickly:

A man broke in, and after looking around and contemplating what to steal he (being a psychic and knowing the girl in all of the pictures would be coming home without the man in all of the pictures) decided to just lock himself back into the apartment and wait for my arrival to inevitably rape and murder me. But, coming in while it was still light did not realize that one light was left on, so when he went around to make it look like no one was there he turned it off, not knowing that I would immediately be thrown off by the darkness.

So that's the situation.

At this point, turning and running would leave me just in a sketchy part of town in the dark and worse off than in my apartment, taking the time to call Jon would put me in a worse situation when he attacked because my focus would be on the phone and conversation and I would be ill equipped to fend off the attack.

So I swiftly went to turn on the kitchen light and walked back to the bedroom, muscles ready to take on anything waiting.

There was nothing.

I called my husband entirely freaked out, only to find out that somehow, in the briefest of moments he had slipped back inside to turn off that light that I had in his mind carelessly although in my mind very thoughtfully left on.

I worried him a bit.

But now I sit here blogging and confessing to the world the craziness that sometimes entertains my thoughts.

Come Away My Beloved.

By Francis J. Roberts.

"O wicked and perverse generation, have I been so long in your midst and yet you have perceived Me not? Have I not ministered unto you in myriad ways, and you have been blind? Yes, and when I speak to you, you do not hear.

O My children, you go your own way as though you belonged to another; yes, you behave not as sons and daughters, but as strangers. You hold meetings in My Name and give honor to mean, but not to Me. You boast that you serve Me, but in truth you serve your own ego; for that which you do is calculated to enhance your own position and advance your own prestive, and you give it all a sanctimonious cloak.

"See," you say, "we shall pray," while prayer is farthest from your heart. And who shall hear you? Only your own ears. Orayer is for those whose hearts cry to Me in sincerity. Prayer is for those who earnestly seek Me; not for those with only a pretend piety, who, with selfish and unworthy motives and hearts made fat with self-adulation, are only playing with Me as a child would manipulate a puppet on a string!

Get to the prayer closet! This is the reason I have taught you to pray in secret: Because there you are beset by fewer false motives and less temptation. He who does not habitually commune with Me is almost sure to find true prayer impossible in public.

You would make Christianity pleasant and acceptable. Your Savior did not find it so. You would make it comfortable and accommodating to your ow schedule. He knew nothing of such a false religion.

Lonely nights, He wrestled in prayer nor spared Himself physical discomfort. Yes, and the more you pamper the flesh as to bodily comfort, the more it will demand of you, until you become its servant, and your physical needs shall be tyrant unto you in your house.

Do not be deceived. I gave you no such commandment. Hear Me as I repeat to you what I gave to your fathers: "Deny your self and take up your cross and follow Me." Yes, follow Me, not some worldly form of a backslidden church.

Do not think that it becomes blessed because it bears the name "church." My Church is a living body, not a dead form. My people may be recognized by their humility and sufferings; not be social acceptability and self-advertised success; not by extravagant physical appointments of their structures, but by the grace of God as work in their hearts. Sacrifice is My status symbol, and humanity has not been eager to recognize the type of spiritual leadership I had in servant like the prophet Jeremiah and the Apostle Paul.

Do you desire to truly follow Me? Look for the bloodstained prints of my feet. Go, as it were, to the cold, unyielding rock in the Garden of Gethsemane, where self is put aside, and the cup of suffering is accepted. Die to your own treacherous and deceitful heart. Rise with determination to go on unflinchingly, not hoping to spare yourself. Save your life and you will sure lose it. Offer it up to Me, this very day, in renewed consecration to sacrificial living, and I will accept you and you shall know joy as a new wine."

I love God.

High school.

We're high school sweethearts, all married and fantastic.

I think that's a really awesome time.

Three hours, three weeks ago was not near enough time with them.

I want them by me all of the time.

End of story.

Feet.

I hate feet.

I think they're gross.

I dont like rubbing feet against other feet.

It all weirds me right out.

But then I read an amazing verse like Isaiah 52:7

"How beautiful upon the mountains

are the feet of him who brings good news,

who publishes peace, who brings good news of happiness,

who publishes salvation,

who says to Zion, "Your God reigns."

And then! I read Nahum the other day and golly me

Nahum 1:15

"Behold, upon the mountains, the feet

of him

who brings good news,

who publishes peace!

Keep your feasts, O Judah;

fulfill your vows,

for never again shall the worthless pass

through you;

he is utterly cut off."

Paul even quotes the Isaiah verse in Romans because it is such a big deal.

I want it tattooed on my foot please.

Three machines.

So as I stand here at 10:44 on a Friday night I have determined that the clothes washing procedure needs to be revamped.

Machine Number One: Wash the clothes

Machine Number Two: Dry the clothes

Machine Number Three: Fold the clothes

Im okay putting them away, but dear goodness I just want to be sitting on my bed not stacking clothes on different piles covering my bed.

Dedicated to Jonathon Ketchum.

Jon claims I have never dedicated a blog to him.

Which I think is absurd considering I talk about Jesus and him most because they're the two best men I have ever known.

But I will dedicate this blog to him either way.

He just devoured a plate full of pasta in less than five minutes, and looks as though he still wants more. His eating skills never cease to impress me. He also writes killer songs that I get to listen to from first rough demo to the end, which is a pretty cool wifely duty if I do say so myself.

I haven't told him yet but I intend to watch Date Night with him tomorrow.

He has wanted to forever and it went out of the movies so quickly we never saw it.

As I finished that sentence he had finished rinsing his plate off and I hear, "You sure you don't want to watch Date Night tonight?"

We havent spoken of that movie in weeks.

We should be married.

I haven't responded to his question yet.

He makes me laugh.

Im done.

Im going to go read Revelation with my husband because that's smart to do.

And sometimes in my life, I make very smart decisions.

Other times I eat two popusas instead of one and then feel very very sick.

That was tonight too.

They can't all be smart decisions!

New Blog.

So I am trying to figure out the best look for my blog.

I am not tech savvy.

I also was super geeked about the whole texting a post to blogger.com and then it being a post. So pretty much when I am reading my Bible at work on my breaks I can just text in the verse I want people to see I am just adoring.

But as I went to look today at how awesome it comes out, I realized it breaks my long text into as many posts as need be. And that is sad to me. So I will only be blogging from my phone pretty much if its less than 160 characters, or I have the patience to wait for the internet on my phone to load a page every 18 minutes.

I am quite a fan of being married.

It really does keep getting better and better.

I am going to be planning our first weekend getaway together and I am pretty ecstatic about it.

Jon turns 21 in October and I thought that it would be amazing to drive a couple hours to somewhere relaxing and fantastic. It was going to be a surprise but, well, surprises stress my husband out so it didn't make much sense to stress him out over his birthday. Plus he might not have taken my request seriously and scheduled to open for Bon Jovi or something, which we all know our weekend away is much more important :)

These past two nights I have been trying to figure out a way to come home in September.

But nothing makes sense or is affordable.

Every time I see my handsome nephews face I cannot bare the thought of waiting until December to hold him and laugh with him.

But he is so addicting I can't stop looking through pictures of him.

He is so perfect.

I cant believe I get two more.

And that I live in California.

I like Galatians 5 a lot today. Well since Monday really. I mean actually it has been awhile since I have been a fan really, but especially today. I like the dictionary app on my blackberry even though I do believe the definitions are a little lame. But it is dictionary.com, and I have always trusted dictionary.com so I am not sure how I feel about the whole situation.

Jon today was reminded that he doesn't like my random mind or the way I choose to ask questions.

"Jon, are you blameless?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I am not really sure how to rephrase that for you... so... Are you blameless?"

It took him a few tries to get his mind to where mine had been for 24 hours.

I appreciate him.

I also appreciate sleep.

I intend to do it before my day starts at 7 am with a workout and work ends at 730 after our fantastic art show, and then I come home and do laundry and cook and clean.

I like being a working wife.

But tomorrow is Thursday.

Which means music comes in the afternoon, and that is a nice break in our day.

But on top of that Thursday is the day before our staff in service day where I get to work 730-430 instead of 9-6.

Praise Jesus for a break in the day in and day out routines of life.

I need to stop typing because I have a budget to update and a newly written song by the talented husband to listen to.

I am partly still bitter about not being able to text in blogs anymore.

It was such a short lived beautiful experience.

2/2: he LORD is great and very awesome; who can endure it?" Love love love the book of Joel. Love my God.

1/2: Joel 2:11 "The LORD utters his voice before his army, for his camp is exceedingly great; he who executed his word is powerful. For the day of t

1/2: Nahum 1:6-7 "Who can stand before his indignation? Who can endure the heat of his anger? His wrath is poured out like fire, and the rocks are b

2/2: roken into pieces by him. The Lord is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble; he knows those who take refuge in him."

The Book of Eli.

Not enough words to encompass this movie.

I never believed a movie could convict me so.

I want more God.

Wonderful

So I work with children.

And sometimes at the end of the day I am really done.

After one too many bumped heads, three too many teeth coming in, art projects gone array, out of diaper messes, 95 degree heat, strawberries for lunch, one cup of coffee, not enough water, and far too many wiped noses I am ready to call it a week a day early.

But all it takes is one handsome little boy to change everything.

After I had swiftly swept up every last puff from our last snack of the day, rushed to rinse out a few milk cups, scrubbed the tables clean, and charted the last diaper changes I slowly drag my body to the carpet where my few remaining babies are happily playing with plastic dishes and stuffed food. Before I even have a chance to sit down one darling little boy looks up to me, and just cracks the tiniest smile. The smile that without words said, "Hey Emily, I think your awesome, I am feeling so silly right now and I just want to play with you." I immediately smile back as I begin to sit down and a huge grin explodes onto his face followed by an eruption of laughter. All because I smiled. I crack up and poke his belly where he proceeds to throw his body onto my lap in shear joy. These moments with him are all it takes for me to remember why I do what I do, despite everything else.

Seriously, the laughter of a child is the best.

My amazing sister posted this video tonight. And I adore it.

This blog goes out to Jaime Davis: I blog too!

Also, I think you should tell me day of when people steal money out of your car from now on.

And I should also have you know, that you're the prettiest, and I can see it in your words.

I'm back.

I am going to blog again in my life.

On this site.

Tumblr failed me. Well, I failed Tumblr.

It is too late to think of anything significant enough to base an entire blog on,

except that it feels good to see this layout on my page again.

And to know that even though these are the most unimportant of words,

there are people out there reading them.

My life is too exciting right now to not be blogging, and I am disappointed in myself that this time has passed without my strange thoughts on what has taken place.

I will sleep a few hours before I try to wake up and work out tomorrow.

Once again, it is good to be back.

Married.

So being married is the very best. And I just get so super excited when other people are about to be married and experience the same joy we are :)

Girl Soul Mate.

This is Jaime Davis.

She's my girl soul mate and it stays that way even when I live in California.

I think she's really super pretty.

And you should see her face when she talks about Jesus.

I know it may be surprising, but it gets even prettier.

She is a blessing that God just went way above and beyond in giving me.

I mean really, I'd be lucky to have a friend half as good as she is.

But God is so great he gave me her.

Oh what a blessed girl I am.

Really and truly.

Just look at that face.

Lisabeth :)

Recording

I wish I could record everything Jonathon says all of the time.

We have the happiest of conversations.

"Emily, you are the most amazing woman ever. You make all my dreams come true."

"What are all your dreams?"

"Being with you..."

"Emily I am never going to get tired of you. Well maybe sometimes, but only for fifteen minutes."

"You could stay tired of me for fifteen minutes?"

"Well I would need the time to convince myself Im not tired of you."

"It would take you fifteen minutes to convince yourself your not tired of me?"

"It takes me fifteen minutes to do anything; change my guitar strings, wake up, poop."

We seriously have the most fun together all of the time. I mean, he's just the best to be so goofy with and laugh with all of the time. He is at rehearsal for another thirty minutes and I need to go to sleep before he gets home. It is already 12:25 and I have to be up at 6 to work out. I would just wait for him to get home like I always end up doing, but starting this weekend that would mean I wouldn't sleep from Friday- Sunday every weekend until the end of june since he starts his exciting tour dates with Mitchel Musso. I must learn how to sleep without him some nights... horrible. If I had to pick one meal to have everyday for the rest of my life. I would choose cereal.

Socks.

Jon put most of the clothes away today.

He matched all my socks.

I was so confused when I went to get socks out tonight.

Why would anyone waste time matching socks?

It makes no sense to me.

Love.

"Your love, its your love, its your love that has saved me

Your blood, its your blood, its your blood that has claimed me"

Friend.

Jon had rehearsal until 10 tonight.

I went out to dinner with a friend.

It was fun.

End of story.

Why I love the women in my life.

Lisabeth :)

Searching.

I think that God sometimes gives us a situation, not just to deal with the situation, but to have the chance to dive into his word with a more feverish effort.

Not having anything to do with what I was searching for I stumbled upon

Romans 11:33, "Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgements and how inscrutable his ways!"

Now I just can't get past that verse.

Also, it may be cliche and all, but I want Isaiah 52:7 tattooed on my foot. I just can't help it.

Farmer's Market.

I went to my first Farmer's Market in Studio City today.

I loved everything about the atmosphere of it.

There were pony rides for kids and so many different vendors.

There is a mexican farmer's market in downtown LA some people at work were telling me about.

I am so excited for a time I can check it out.

I met an awesomely unique and sweet woman named Linda.

I am not into jewelry much, but singing her handcrafted jewelry I was kind of lured in.

I absolutely fell in love with two of her necklaces.

They are so unique, so detailed and just hold so much character.

Sadly I don't have $90 and $110 to drop on a necklace, and if I did, I probably still couldn't have brought myself to.

But she was so awesome and we talked forever and I would be her friend in real life.

She has such a fun story and it was so endearing listening to her talk.

I bought 2 lemons and some scrumptious strawberries.

I don't need lemons for anything.

But the man who was running the stand was older and just looked like such a hardworking man and I wanted him to know I appreciate his work and that he should keep going. So we smiled and I bought a lemon. His oranges were also so super yummy tasting, but I didn't bring money to do real life grocery shopping. I just wanted to look around and get a feel for life.

I wanted to buy my meat from another awesome old working man.

I looked through his binder about his grass-fed cows and listened to him talk about the different types of meat he has and how he makes it and what not. He just seemed so passionate about something seemingly so simple. The lady next to me was telling me this was the best meat she has ever had. That the meat is so good for you and you don't need to eat a lot to fill up so it lasts and on and on she went. I would love to make Sundays my day to go to the market and cook all of my meals for the week. But that just won't happen no matter how ideal it may sound. I will get a rhythm soon enough. I just have to decide what is worth spending more on and what is worth just going without.

Food Inc.

Jon and I just watched this documentary about where our food is coming from.

It is atrocious.

Jon never wants to eat again.

And I am determined to make a major lifestyle change to keep my husband and I healthy and energized for life.

I am going to my first farmers market tomorrow and I am so very excited.

Making this change is going to cost us money that we don't have.

So I am determined to find a way to make this happen.

I need all of the suggestions I can get.

:-)

Challenges.

I have officially decided that being married, starting a new life practically and keeping in touch with the people that I love so dearly and have been so supportive from the 20 years of my life is extremely challenging.

I haven't figured out yet how to do it right and that is starting to bother me. I feel like there is not enough time in the day to spend with God, hang out with the greatest husband ever, keep the apartment clean and the husband fed, talk to two sets of parents, however many siblings I have now, and all of the friends that are so precious in my heart. But while doing all of that I have to spend 9 hours out of my day at work. And I am also supposed to start getting involved in church and making my own friends here...

Proverbs 31:12 "She does him [her husband] good, and not harm, all the days of her life."

Jon and I were listening to a sermon series before we got married. In one of the sermons the pastor shares a study that found it takes a married couple typically seven years before they're first response to their spouse is selfless rather than selfish. You don't realize how selfish you are until you are married. But the amazing blessing in that as well is that you don't realize how forgiving you can be either.

Jonathon has all of these newfound crazy amazing opportunities. It is so fun coming before the Lord together and just waiting for his voice and guidance.

Work is going swell. I realized today that I don't talk as much as I really talk in real life. That really bothered me. But I don't know what to do different about it. I have just found a new passion for listening, truly listening to people. I have just fallen in love with listening to different people talk... that I forget to join in. Anyone who knows me, knows this is very strange.

Some things I hated doing before that I thought would change once I got married:

Folding laundry- still hate

Doing dishes- only sometimes hate

Going to the bank- still hate

Vacuuming- still hate

Cooking- absolutely love

Pumping gas- still hate

Separating socks- still hate

We got our wedding pictures yesterday. Sooo many. They are so amazing and I am so excited to show them off.

Problem with the pictures?

The week of my wedding... I lost weight I guess.

Now typically this would be an amazing blessing.

But in my dress... you can see I lost weight.

And that makes some pictures very unflattering of me. And I thought that when you were a bride everything was flattering because you were just flawless all of the time... that's only in movies. I also thought that when you lost weight everything looked more flattering... also a myth. If I can just train myself to get over that... Ill be fine. I am also sure that if I didn't post that information for the world to see... no one would have noticed.

While looking through the pictures Jonathon told me that for the pictures he understood why I had to have as much make up as I did on, and he didn't notice then, but that he liked me better the way I looked last night... with only day old mascara on... he would.

There are dishes in the sink right now and it is majorly bothering me. But Jonathon is learning songs for this new potential gig he has... and with the water running he would have to turn the music up too loud to hear since he is near deaf and then we'd get another noise complaint and that would just be a problem. So here I sit, not doing dishes, and putting off some other necessary things I have to do because I can't stop thinking about the dishes.

I miss blogging my heart out :)

Proverbs 31.

I like Proverbs 31.

It reminds me of all the ways I need to grow :)

Easter.

It's weird not spending this Easter in Lansing.

No egg cracking contest.

It's all just so strange.

Jon's playing the youth services today at church.

So I have been having a very productive morning.

It feels good.

I am still not sure what our first Easter together is going to look like.

I want to cook a real yummy dinner but who knows what else.

Everything I think of costs more money than we have.

I have been falling in love with Jesus in a whole new way since I've been married.

Marriage just keeps getting better and better.

Glasses.

This morning I tried on Jonathon's glasses.

The room went so crazy blurry.

While he wasn't wearing his contacts we then proceeded to look around the room and describe the way we saw things.

His glasses make my perfect sight like his nearly blind sight.

It was all so strange.

Dreams.

I have had some very very strange dreams lately.

Maybe I can accredit it to the twin bed Jonathon and I have been sharing for 2 months now.

Or maybe to the fact that I watch CSI: Miami on a regular basis.

Regardless of why I am having them, they are weird.

About a week ago I had a dream my mom and I were shopping at an American Eagle.

She wanted to buy me a new pair of shoes.

She picked out these black chunky things and said she wanted to buy them for me because they'd go with anything.

I politely told her I had a lot of black shoes and I wanted something more fun and sassy.

So we found these real tall and strappy blue shoes.

They were awesome.

And were on sale!

Fantastic.

So we found a generic pair of black shoes that we decided we'd get too and just share.

And then as we were going to check out we realized they were on sale too!

So we were ecstatic.

And since my mom saved so much money we saw these lions that were pretty cheap considering they were full grown lions.

Naturally we thought owning a lion would be pretty sweet.

We purchased him.

We were so excited to show my dad but when he saw we bought a lion he was pissed off.

I mean livid.

He took one look at the lion covered in a burlap bag and told us it was not tame.

Since it was not tame he then had to build another room onto the house for it to stay in.

I held the lion very firmly against the wall as he proceeded to do this.

Since I am little compared to a full grown lion my dad only had 24 hours to build this new room.

So there I stood.

Holding this untamed lion against the wall.

And that's when I woke up.

My arms were flexed and I was sweating.

Last night I had a dream I was adopted.

I didn't recognize anyone in my dream and it was all so very strange.

The only thing I remember was when my adoptive mom took me to meet my new grandma.

We sat on the floor for some reason on her real ugly carpet and talked.

Her name was Grandma Tozo.

I really liked her and thought that I was going to be happy with my adoptive family.

And this mom leans over to the Grandma Tozo and says

"Emily doesn't know this yet, but we plan on running her entire life for her and never allowing her to make a single decision for herself."

And then I woke up.

I didn't want to go back to sleep for the lion dream.

I was too worn out and as my arms were weakening I was afraid it would sense my fading strength and turn to attack.

But this adoptive dream last night I really wanted to go back to sleep to see what would happen next. I wonder how I would have responded. I bet I would have run away. I have never run away in real life so I bet in my dream I would have.

The Shred.

I am disappointed to say that I am back to The Shred.

I reached a point last summer where I could do level three and barely break a sweat.

Now I am stuck on level two. Sweating. A lot.

I am determined to make this change very quickly by getting my body into a routine of waking up at 615 to work out before work every day.

I am looking forward to this very much.

I am also looking forward to the weekends of beautiful sun and heat where I can swim laps in the pool.

Although it won't be as good of a workout since Jaime wont be here.

She always loved kicking my butt by making me swim without my arms or legs for laps at a time.

And well.

We did almost drown once.

That was a good time.

Denise.

I hope by reading this blog you have an extra laugh in your day...

Okay bye.

Mother.

My mom just stayed up until one in the morning to talk to me.

It was fantastic.

She is such an amazing woman.

I love that she is my friend.

Angela is so beautiful and I love when she talks.

My dad is such a goofball.

Some of the things he was doing on skype reminded me so much of Jonathon.

I think they are a lot more alike than I have realized.

Every goofy face or anything silly that he continued to do because he got a kick out of it just reminded me of my everyday life with Jonathon.

And it made my heart super happy.

Because having a dad like him was amazing.

He always made us laugh, and it was okay when it was at him, he didn't mind.

Jon is that way with me already.

He'll be such a great dad in 5 years.

Zechariah :)

My mom just sent me a series of videos of my amazing amazing nephew.

Oh golly I just can't get enough of him.

You should see him now.

So perfect.

So funny.

So stubborn. :)

I get to hug the bageebers out of him in 2 months!!

It is going to be the very best.

Blogger.

I am failing miserably at being a fantastic blogger.

Every spare moment I have I want to spend with Jonathon and not on the computer.

This whole once a week blog has got to stop.

I also have to post pictures of my amazing apartment.

I have found something I absolutely hate about California;

that is the time change from Michigan.

When Jonathon leaves in the evening some nights a week are perfect opportunities to sit cuddled up in my bed talking to my beautiful friends and family in Michigan.

But by then they are all sleeping.

And that is so very lame to me.

I have an hour break for lunch which I use to call my mom sometimes.

But I have decided that some days I really just need that break for me.

Sometimes I need a break from talking believe it or not.

And I have discovered a bike path by my work.

So one of these days during my break I will awkwardly change in my car and strap on my rollerblades and go for an hour long adventure!!! I am so excited.

I am also excited to come home in less than three months.

Also on the note of sometimes needing a break from talking, sometimes I really don't.

Jon has been at church since I got home at about 8.

And I worked out and showered and blah blah.

And I talk to myself.

Officially.

Out loud.

One night Jon was gone all evening and I didn't talk to myself once.

I tried to sleep forever and I couldn't because I just missed him so much.

And when he walked through the door I was uncontrollable.

I have never heard myself speak so quickly in my life.

I am pretty sure I didn't breathe for an hour.

He thought it was hilarious.

But it tuckered me right out.

So now I have discovered that if I talk to myself out loud.

I don't need to store it all up and dump it on him the moment I see his face.

Which by the way,

is so absolutely handsome.

I guess I do the same thing when I only blog once a week as well.

One random statement to the next.

Jonathon will be home any minute now!

Oh I just get so giddy for him.

Toothbrush.

Jon and I have been living together for six weeks now or something.

We have two toothbrushes in the little toothbrush holder thing.

Just this moment we have discovered that we have been using the same toothbrush.

I thought it was a discovery deserving of its own blog.

Missing Jonathon.

Jonathon is playing a show tonight.

21+ only.

I am so sick of being little.

Instead I will stay home and be super productive with everything I have already gotten behind on since I have started work. Bad wife points already!

And then drink nyquil and go to bed real early since I have an approximately 12 hour day tomorrow.

A few of the kids at work have these nasty nasty coughs.

So.

Of course, no matter how many vitamins I take, orange juice I drink and how many hours I sleep, I have been waking up through the nights with this awful painful cough :) But I feel fine enough to function at least.

Life is good.

Loving California more and more everyday.

It's weird that 5 weeks in I feel like there is still so entirely much to do.

I miss Handprints.

I miss Zechariah.

That is all to my story.

Real Life Super Heroes.

I love being a part of a church where everyone's creative abilities are spent for the Glory of God.

Come on now.

How can watching a group of God fearing men in black suites and sunglasses, dancing to Men in Black not make you want to live your life with an intense mission for Jesus?

Work..

I start work tomorrow.

I am excited.

Jon and I will officially see each other for less than 2 hours after work before we both head off to our evening plans separately. It will be a weird change but I think kind of good for us as sad as that is to say. At this point I feel like I just can't get enough of him. I can't imagine what being away from him for 9 hours a day is going to do to that. Regardless, I can only handle this vacation feel for so long. I need to be productive. I need to wake up before 9 am. I need to go to bed before midnight. I need to be investing into lives other than Jon and mine. And lets be honest, I need to be making money.

And a girl I will be working with and I are already friends.

That's really comforting.

And my house is on her way to work.

So that will be such a blessing considering Jon and I are sharing a car.

He was pretty geeked when she was very persistent in being able to pick me up tomorrow.

He doesn't have to be up at 730 am, which is a blessing because I have never got him out of bed before 930 :)

God is really good to us.

Oasis is doing a series called Real Life Superheroes.

Today's message was on Men in Black.

It was real real good stuff about having God's mission in our lives.

Being on a mission is an exhilarating feeling!

Especially when it's real.

Oh it is Love.

Our wedding was so perfect.

Being married is so much fun.

Jesus is so good to us.

Jonathon is the best husband there has ever been.

And I love being his wife.

For almost a month we have been together pretty much 24/7.

And I am dreading going back to work.

When he is gone for a 3 hour rehearsal I miss him so much.

I adore him.

Post it notes.

I am obsessed with post it notes.

There is just something about them.

It's weird.

Tonight as I went to take my birth control I opened up the little packet and inside was a post it note.

On it was scribbled...

"You're going to be the best mom ever....

in 8 years."

I love my husband.

Today.

I love everything about today already.

Over a year ago I met a girl at one of Jon's shows.

She was the girlfriend of the drummer and we hit it off instantly.

We talked all night about how in love we were and how we knew we were going to marry these guys and on and on.

We had so much in common with our pasts and we just became instant friends.

We exchanged phone numbers and I never saw her again.

We talked though.

We had amazing conversations.

She lives over an hour away in good traffic.

But her and her husband are coming out and we are all going out to dinner tonight.

I am just so very excited because I super like her a lot.

And we both married the boys we couldn't stop being giddy over!

Until then I get to work out, go get a physical for my new job, run a few errands and smile a lot.

Provision.

So I applied for a job last Thursday.

I only sent in my resume because Jon and I went over our budget the night before and there is no more time for this enjoying every moment together vacation stuff that I am loving ever so deeply. Well I got the interview Friday, accepted the position 30 minutes after I left. I don't know when I start. Even though everyone tells me I shouldn't get a second job, no one has seen our budget, so I have been looking everyday on craigslist for random part time jobs I could do. I sent my resume to someone today as I sat on Jon's lap and we were both very reluctant. We know that we need the financial help but this extra job would have really limited our time together. Limited time is really not what we're after here. I can barely handle when he has to practice for an hour. I just start to miss hugging him! Weirdo. I know.

Well a couple hours later in a matter of ten minutes he received two phone calls for gig offers. One of which is tonight and let me just say he'll make as much in two hours as Ill make in a full day and a half of work. If my job paid half of what his did we'd have all the time in the world to be cute and married and stuff. But I wouldn't trade in my job for better pay already. There is just something about working with children. Jon said it very well today as we discussed the differences in our jobs. Kids just dont care how tall I am or how my hair looks. They just want to laugh and build towers and learn about the scary but exciting world that surrounds them. And I like laughing, I love building towers and I sure as heck love to teach. This is a random and unorganized blog. But that is kind of how my mind is right now. I am enjoying rain, tea, Isaiah and a feather penned journal and my mind is all over the world. Thinking, praying, wondering, planning and just overjoyed with life. God is so good to us. He has blessed this time so much. I am going to make sloppy joes tonight :) I love to cook. I love being a wife. And I love looseleaf tea!! So much.

Job.

Well I got that job I interviewed for.

Ill be teaching 9-18 month olds :)

Im nervous.

I miss my babies.

A lot.

One.

Zechariah's first birthday party was today.

I wasn't there.

I was fine all day. Honestly, I was pretty much absorbed in my own life trying to ignore the fact.

But I just saw a picture of him.

I haven't seen him in 2 weeks to the day and he looks like a totally different boy.

All grown up.

So handsome.

His eyes captivate me.

His smile is precious beyond words.

I love being his aunt.

And I miss him so deeply.

Being Lazy.

I am not one for being lazy.

I am not one for sleeping in past nine or taking naps.

But it's just so different when you have someone to do it with.

I thought that this week Jon and I were going to do crazy things all of the time and be super adventurous.

Turns out we just sit around.

And I wouldn't change a minute of it.

Granted we go places and do things and it's all fun.

But we just lay together, and it feels good.

I got him out of bed this morning before ten and we did P90X Kempo.

It's pretty much kickboxing and I felt so much freedom working out in a place twice the size of my old apartment while Jon kicked everything in his path because he is so long :) I love him.

The other day we hiked up a mountain and had a nice picnic lunch and read the Bible and prayed together there.

Yesterday we walked to Starbucks and read there.

And today we drove to the classic Cafe Audrey.

I like going to different places to read the Bible together.

It's a fun feel.

Tomorrow Jon and I are taking a test to possibly be census takers. If you never hear about this again it's because we are too dumb and they didn't want to hire us.

At 3:30 tomorrow I have my first interview.

I am nervous.

I am just trusting God to make it very clear where he wants me.

When I do things like send my resume places and search for jobs and clean and stuff while Jon practices and sends out his resume and stuff, I start to miss him. It's weird and silly of me, we're only ten feet away. But I guess after over 2 years of not getting to be in his arms when I want to it gets hard to not be in his arms when he's so close. I wonder if this changes. It's hard to be productive so I hope it does. But at the same time, I really hope it doesn't.

Im obsessed with cooking. I love feeding my husband. It sounds so silly but I just love cooking up yummy meals for us. Who would've thought. Surely not I.

Theres my I haven't blogged in forever quick update. Ill get better about blogging.

Life.

I love the adventures of life.

Jon and I are officially moved into our new place.

We are going to turn the keys for his old place in today.

Friday night was our first night here and last night held our first dinner.

I made chicken and pasta and we sat on the floor and ate with our new dishes and silverware.

It was good fun.

We laugh a lot.

I have already been to 3 goodwills.

We had our first grocery shopping trip as a married couple last night at Trader Joes.

We are going to costco today :)

It is my dad's birthday today and it is strange not being there for a big dinner with everyone around. I wonder if it will eventually feel normal to miss big things like this.

My computer is lost in the mail.

If it doesn't come by Monday then I will have to redo my resume.

I didn't really care that much that it was lost. My mom got insurance for it and Jon has a desktop and a laptop so we're more than set on computers.

But then I thought about all of my pictures and my list of who gets a thank you card for being absolutely amazing. And so now I'll be ticked if it doesn't come.

We leave for church in 2 hours.

Im excited.

And even a tiny bit nervous.

Laugh Factory.

The other night we went to the Laugh Factory with a couple friends. Im in California so I half expected to want to get up and walk out, surprisingly enough though, I laughed at a lot of things. Some of these people were pretty funny. Two of them I absolutely hated though, hated so bad I wanted to get up on stage and set everyone else straight. One girl just got married and all of her jokes were about pretty much how it's not that great and how they'll be lucky if they don't get a divorce but the wedding was everything she ever wanted. Well that was annoying to me. And the other guy was talking about his wife and his one year old child. He said that his kid is a life sucker and he has to smoke weed to stay sane around him and his wife is not the same as she was before they had the baby and it's not a good thing. I was appalled. First I was thinking he was just being an idiot and going to turn it around to how they're the greatest ever. But no. He left it at that, and whether he said all of that because it's true or just to make people laugh I was disgusted that he would say it.

There was another guy that actually got me thinking more than anything. Thinking about my senior year theology class and how my teacher was so spot on with what he used the year to teach us and have us teach ourselves. This guys bit went something to the effect of this:

How every religion is the same they just have one thing that they claim to keep them seeming different. Like Christianity, you have to say Jesus is God and you go to heaven or you don't claim him and you burn in hell, not for 5 years, but for eternity. So I'm going to die, go to heaven, see Jesus and he'll say something like, "You were a great dad and you did this and this but you didn't say I was God so you are going to hell, forever." (meanwhile Jon and I are sitting there nodding, yes, yes buddy you would go to hell). He then went on to say how he hates the bumper stickers that read, "Jesus is Lord, Read the Bible." He said that is like saying, "Animals can talk, watch Dr. Doolitle." My immediate response was to get ticked, but not a moment after I realized how right he was and if I were in his place I'd be annoyed about the same thing. He just went on about how Christians pretty much are so dumb for using the Bible as proof when it is the only place that says it, and if he thinks the Bible is a load of crap then why would he believe anything in it. The laughter that roared from these jokes made it clear that I have my work cut out for me.

sick.

I'm getting sick.

And it stinks.

Wedding Night.

Jon and I sat on the couch of our suite in The Westin, waiting for our luggage. As we sat there he began to tell me that he has promised to keep God in the very center of our marriage and he wanted to show me that by starting our marriage reading the Bible and praying. I am so in love with him. He vowed to read at least 2 chapters a day with me. We started by reading Song of Solomon; so very fitting :) We decided it would be fun to read through the Bible going through one book at a time, randomly. So last night we started on Job 1-2. I love when we read the Bible together. Job always gets me. In the very first chapter I am just in awe of how God brags about his precious son Job. I think it is just a beautiful reality of how God has made us his own and dances over us, sings over us, loves us and wants to push it in Satan's face that we are his devout followers, lovers and children. From Job chapter one we also were given the amazing example of falling face down in worship to God, no matter the circumstances. Right now things are pretty spiffy. We just got married and we're madly in love. God is covering our finances crazily, he has provided us with an amazing apartment to move into, beautiful family and friends ( A real real handsome nephew) and just blessing beyond measure. But life isn't always going to be this way for us. And even when everything seems to be falling apart. We will fall facedown in worship. Because our God, he reigns victorious and we will always praise his Holy Name.

Marriage.

Being married is pretty much amazing. Every moment keeps getting better and better. We have a place to live :-) God loves us so much. He is making everything fall into place for us.

Why I love Hugh.

This is why hanging out with a three year old for my best friend is the greatest.

As I am peeing he comes up outside the door:

"Emily, you better hurry up and get out of there or mommy and daddy will come home and see me out here all by myself and think you don't take care of me and leave me alone."

Other quotes from the evening:

Me: "What's the plan for our last night together Hugh?"

Hugh: "Well, we will start by reading books and then, well, you just don't worry about the plan, I know what we're doing."

"Let's go in the front bedroom, but be careful, it gets all trippy in there."

As we're laying in bed:

Me: "I love you Hugh."

Hugh: "I love you too."

Me: "Jesus loves you."

Hugh: "Jesus doesn't love me Emily, God loves me."

Me: "oh. oh alright."

Silence.

Hugh: "Emily?"

Me: "Ya?"

Hugh: "You know who is in my heart?"

Me: "No I don't. Who?"

Hugh: "Jesus is."

Me: "No way! Who's Jesus."

Hugh: "Well, I think he works for God. Ya, He works for God."

Me: "Oh, What does he do for him?"

Hugh: "Well, he cooks for him, and he makes smoke alarms and puts them on the walls for him, and I think he makes light bulbs and puts them in those things that are there in the things."

Me: "Wow, that's awesome of Jesus. Does he do anything else for God?"

Hugh: "Oh yes, He builds him all sorts of houses."

Me: "With what?"

Hugh: "Don't worry about it Emily"

"Listen Emily, I am not going to sleep until mommy and daddy come home because I do not go to sleep until I give them kisses."

"Hey, don't you think this is such a pectacular puzzle?"

"How about you just go to California for a week and come right back?"

I am going to miss this kid.

Final Fitting.

I had my final fitting today. I tried on my dress with greasy hair, hadn't showered in 2 days, washed my hair in probably longer, Im hairy so I can get waxed next week and I am just all on nasty. Sorry for the horrible horrible image. But I put it on, slipped my shoes on and stood in front of the mirror. And as I stood there, I felt absolutely flawless. And I don't have that feeling much in my life, actually probably never have I experienced that. But it was the most amazing feeling. And I can't believe I get to wear it in one week. I can't believe how much I still have to do! And I am sitting here blogging. And I plan on taking a bath today for no reason other than the fact that I want to.

Thank you cards.

It took me all summer to write my graduation thank you cards. I don't think it's going to be like that this time around. I am so anxious to start. It is hard for me to not be writing them right now because of how ridiculously blessed I feel by people. I just keep reminding myself Ill have time once I am in California and I don't have 78 thousand little last minute wedding things to try to finish while I plaster my eyes open trying not to fall asleep.

Breakfast at Tiffany's.

I am not sure where my fascination with Audrey Hepburn came. I am also not sure why Breakfast at Tiffany's remains the best movie of all time in my mind. But I do know that when my emotions are crazy, Jesus always is there to sit and drink tea with me as we watch Breakfast at Tiffany's together. I love that about Jesus. He takes such good care of my heart. I hope I never get sick of Breakfast at Tiffany's. I feel like we have experienced every emotion together. I mean; I am about to put in the 3rd disc I have owned and I am praying to God it doesn't scratch and stay frozen at the party scene forever and ever like the first two did. It needs to make it through the whole movie for me tonight.

A wife.

I am going to be a wife. In my mind I keep coming up with all of these cute things I want to do as a wife. I think I am going to start keeping a list so I don't forget. Today I had one idea. It's a real real good idea. And I realized that in a month I might forget it. So I need to start a list.

Bridal Shower.

I had a bridal shower today. It was too perfect for words. My bridesmaids are so stinkin amazing. I am still in awe of it all and it has been over for five hours now. I feel so blessed to have been showered upon in so many ways today. I almost just cant even write about it yet. It all feels so surreal to me. I am getting married in 13 days! How incredibly crazy and exciting is this?

15 days.

My wedding day is 15 days away. As I stood in front of the mirror this morning it hit me in a way it hadn't before. And I liked it. I just cried and prayed and thanked Jesus a super lot for being so good to me. Because he is so good to me. My bridal shower is in 2 days. Thats so weird. Im a bride. For real a bride. I fooled around with my hair a bit because I am doing it myself. And I think it has potential of being perfect. I am making all of the favors today with the dearest Jesse Scenga. I am so excited. My mind is going crazy with all that I have to do that no one can really do for me. But as I accomplish one thing at a time I feel better and better. Exciting exciting things are happening. I am moving to California! It's weird. It kind of feels like I am just getting ready for another trip. But it's for good. I mean, God might move us somewhere eventually. But for now. It will be my home out there. Jon wrote me a song this summer. In it he wrote the line; "Your the home where I belong." He left that on a blue post it note in my apartment when he left from that September trip. I put it on my door and it has been there ever since. I am glad to be going home with Jonathon. He is where I belong. Im so ready to be his wife.

Ihop.

ihop.org

Live feed of their prayer room.

This is amazing.

I feel like I am there and I am just watching it online.

Everyone should watch these all of the time.

Gas.

Jaime locked her keys in her car while she was getting gas today.

As I pulled in three hours later to get gas I had a weird feeling in my gut, but I safely secured my keys in my pocket and reminded myself I don't ever lock my door away anyways. I finished and got in my car and laughed at my silliness of thinking that something weird was going to happen. As I pulled onto I-75 I noticed my gas door thingy was open. The rest of the way home I couldn't remember for the life of me if I had put the twisty cap on. By the time I pulled onto my street I came to the conclusion I for sure did not and it had to be gone by now. That's why there was a random honk when I pulled out of the gas station. When I got out I went to shut it and saw the twisty cap sitting right there on the back of my car. Over ten miles, turns and expressways that little cap never fell off. That's real cute of Jesus :-)

Anxious.

For I believe the first time, I began to feel very anxious about my wedding tonight. As Jaime and I spent the evening shopping for bridesmaid shoes and jewelry I was enjoying my time with her and just feeling relaxed to be in her presence. I pretty much forced her into making some decisions because my mind was slowly getting on overload. When I got home my mind would not stop. The amount of things I have left to do is outrageous. Here this past month I thought that I was super on top of things and making a lot of leeway, and now, seventeen days away from my wedding my mind does not stop reminding me of all that has yet to be accomplished. In the midst of my crazy thought processes I just text Jonathon asking him to pray for me. He called me and as I started to mention the list of things to do he very firmly yet gently told me to stop what I was doing, go make tea, and read my Bible. I am a stubborn and very determined girl. So when I have a list of things to do I am not about to stop it. Plus my pride snuck in and in my mind I got all huffy; does he really think I haven't read my Bible yet today, it's already 10 pm and I have to get this stuff done so I can sleep longer than 5 hours tonight. As he persisted that I needed to drink tea and read my Bible my pridPost Optionse shattered and my determination for accomplishing wedding tasks was corrected to determination for God. And I had realized I hadn't read my Bible yet today. So I began at Isaiah 40. I stopped at verse 8 because it leaves me in awe. And what was going to be my Bible and Tea break has turned into the end of today for me. Im glad God is making my eyes so heavy I have no choice but to sleep. I really could use it.

Charades.

Anytime someone suggests charades I try to get out of it. I just always start out hating charades. But about 2 people in I wonder why I tried to get out of the game because it is pretty much an amazing game. It was my parents, Nicole and Eric, Angela, and Jon and I. It was hilarious. For a few hours we went through the different Cranium cards acting like fools as my dad kept score by building domino towers. The girls kicked butt. Zechariah takes like an hour nap at 8 instead of sleeping all night so he played with us till past midnight. He thought putting a domino in his mouth and bouncing it with his fingers was fantastic. His top right tooth is starting to come through. It feels nice. I like seeing him grow.